Happy Friday friends! For once I have no date for the weekend. I may call RG to get laid. He complained yesterday that he did not get to see me enough. (Thought we were having fun.  Seeing each other more than twice a week is slowly getting on the relationship train. Men, we don’t come crazy. You make us that way.) GK Ultra is finally let back into the sea with the other crazy fish. I did not ghost, took my own advice

Anyhoo, I got to thinking about this song (A.M. Gold anyone?) and how times have changed since Rupert Holmes was writing to a newspaper for a date. Maybe personal columns were a better way to find someone. You actually had to put effort into that shit if you wanted to meet someone. Find a pen, a paper, and buy a stamp.  (For you millennials, a stamp is a little sticker that you put on the corner of an envelope to put in a mailbox with the flag up to communicate.)

To make it a Fun Friday, I rewrote “Escape” to go with today’s times.  I’ve even put the instrumental down below so you can sing along to yourself

I was sad on a Friday night, thinking there was no one my type

So I take out my cell phone, and began to swipe

While I lay there sipping, enjoying my wine

A profile caught my eye, and I had to make him mine

 

If you like Ultra and fireball,  a little Netflix and Chill

If you’re fit and active, and want to go to Brazil

If you like drinking on a patio, I’m your hookup for the night

I won’t text you tomorrow, but take a chance and swipe right

 

I ignored my gut feeling, cuz he seemed like a catch

So I took a chance and swiped right, and we were a match

So I wrote him a message, how do I make myself stand out?

Based it on his profile, and erased any doubts.

 

Yes I like Ultra and fireball, and Netflix and Chill

Please don’t be Charles Manson, and set me up for a kill

I’ve got to meet you within a week, only so much to do through texts

Let’s have drinks at my local bar,  see if you can back up your sexts

 

I waited on my bar stool, when he walked in I could see

It was the same guy who ghosted,  on the app with the little bee

I laughed and said you disappeared, I thought you were dead

He replied don’t worry about the past, you’ll end up in my bed

 

If you like Ultra and fireball, and a little Netflix and Chill

If you’re fit and active, and want to go to Brazil

If you like drinking on a patio, I’m your hookup for the night

I won’t text you tomorrow, but take a chance and swipe right

 

If you like Ultra and fireball, and a little Netflix and Chill

If you’re fit and active, and want to go to Brazil

If you like drinking on a patio, I’m your hookup for the night

I won’t text you tomorrow, but take a chance and swipe right

 

I hope you have a great Friday and don’t forget, stalk that motherfucker before meeting him, and for God’s sake make him at least buy you a drink first.

 

Always–Ellie